Hola my muchachos and muchachettes,
So okay, we’ve got Sinco de Mayo coming up here in May or June, and I think Jessica has some plans in the works for a traditional Mexican feast with lots of hot sauced goodies and the such. Sinco de Mayo falls between Sinco de quatorso and Sinco de sixo and is the celebration where the snakes were driven out of Ireland by Saint Vidas after which they had the annual dance in remembrance of the event. It is also a celebration of when Montizuma forced the Spanish conquistadoors out of South America and set up a lucrative business trade with Irving Starbucks, who late in life became famous as the urinal cake king. Historically, the ousting of the Spanish is know as Montizumas revenge and is still celebrated with must gusto, just not in Spain where it is knows as the Montezuma Police Action and technically is still going on. Anyway, what with the traditional big hat things that they wear down there and the lovely scarves and sandals, we should have a great time. Of course Kelly will be in charge of the prize shelf and picking the best costumes... This year we have in addition to the lovely paper clip and cough drop, a wonderful all plastic Chevron Gift Card with a nice picture of the Chevron logo. It has no dollar value but can really perk up and add character to an otherwise dreary wallet or purse. We also have a lovely rubber finger thing that you use to separate checks and mail and stuff so you don’t have to keep licking your finger all the time and possibly contracting a nasty bug. I’ve heard we will be having sopapilla or maybe polio con carne, and maybe one of those fancy desserts like flan for flatus. If anyone can play the guitar or maybe the trumpet we could put together a marichacha band and circulate around the neighborhood for a few minutes singing and dancing with a happy Latin beat. Also, if someone has one of those Pineyauhta things that are stuffed with Twinkies and cupcakes and dingdongs, we good get a bunch of sticks and have a Pineyauhta smashing event where all the sineretas (girls) gather about and bash the thing until the cream filling comes gushing out of the cup cakes and such. Way back in the olden days before they had the cream filled food group they used to fill the Pineyauhta with large stones and the idea was to hang it in a tree and try to bash it till it opened and then run away to avoid the rocks before you got your head bashed in. We’ve come a long way baby. Sinco de Mayo comes from the Latin verb Sincus which means “go below the water,” as in a ship sincus; and, de Mayo coming from the Egyptian for Mayonnaise which was and still is a creamy white sandwich fixin best used with bolognie or maybe thin sliced ham and a mild cheddar with a chunk of pickle. .We translate Sinco de Mayo in English to mean “time of great blessings when the infidel Americans and French where forced to take their evil ways and depart hence into the wilderness like a plague of locusts sweeping through the village like a great rushing wind that was hot like the breath of heck, or something.” Anywho, lets all get gussied up for Sinco de Mayo. The holiday used to be called “Slinko do May” and involved a snake on a stick, but that is too difficult to say five times in a row, so it was shortened. Have a mucho grade day.
Mochas Gracias,
Francois Coupe de Ville, Prof.
Historiano de la casa por la Mexicano stuffo.
125 1/2 Calle de la Cucaracha
Margaritaville, MX 25478935651245-B
So okay, we’ve got Sinco de Mayo coming up here in May or June, and I think Jessica has some plans in the works for a traditional Mexican feast with lots of hot sauced goodies and the such. Sinco de Mayo falls between Sinco de quatorso and Sinco de sixo and is the celebration where the snakes were driven out of Ireland by Saint Vidas after which they had the annual dance in remembrance of the event. It is also a celebration of when Montizuma forced the Spanish conquistadoors out of South America and set up a lucrative business trade with Irving Starbucks, who late in life became famous as the urinal cake king. Historically, the ousting of the Spanish is know as Montizumas revenge and is still celebrated with must gusto, just not in Spain where it is knows as the Montezuma Police Action and technically is still going on. Anyway, what with the traditional big hat things that they wear down there and the lovely scarves and sandals, we should have a great time. Of course Kelly will be in charge of the prize shelf and picking the best costumes... This year we have in addition to the lovely paper clip and cough drop, a wonderful all plastic Chevron Gift Card with a nice picture of the Chevron logo. It has no dollar value but can really perk up and add character to an otherwise dreary wallet or purse. We also have a lovely rubber finger thing that you use to separate checks and mail and stuff so you don’t have to keep licking your finger all the time and possibly contracting a nasty bug. I’ve heard we will be having sopapilla or maybe polio con carne, and maybe one of those fancy desserts like flan for flatus. If anyone can play the guitar or maybe the trumpet we could put together a marichacha band and circulate around the neighborhood for a few minutes singing and dancing with a happy Latin beat. Also, if someone has one of those Pineyauhta things that are stuffed with Twinkies and cupcakes and dingdongs, we good get a bunch of sticks and have a Pineyauhta smashing event where all the sineretas (girls) gather about and bash the thing until the cream filling comes gushing out of the cup cakes and such. Way back in the olden days before they had the cream filled food group they used to fill the Pineyauhta with large stones and the idea was to hang it in a tree and try to bash it till it opened and then run away to avoid the rocks before you got your head bashed in. We’ve come a long way baby. Sinco de Mayo comes from the Latin verb Sincus which means “go below the water,” as in a ship sincus; and, de Mayo coming from the Egyptian for Mayonnaise which was and still is a creamy white sandwich fixin best used with bolognie or maybe thin sliced ham and a mild cheddar with a chunk of pickle. .We translate Sinco de Mayo in English to mean “time of great blessings when the infidel Americans and French where forced to take their evil ways and depart hence into the wilderness like a plague of locusts sweeping through the village like a great rushing wind that was hot like the breath of heck, or something.” Anywho, lets all get gussied up for Sinco de Mayo. The holiday used to be called “Slinko do May” and involved a snake on a stick, but that is too difficult to say five times in a row, so it was shortened. Have a mucho grade day.
Mochas Gracias,
Francois Coupe de Ville, Prof.
Historiano de la casa por la Mexicano stuffo.
125 1/2 Calle de la Cucaracha
Margaritaville, MX 25478935651245-B
1 comment:
Oh. My. Gosh. What an absurd stream of consciousness... We need to get him an editorial column in a local newspaper! Funny stuff! :)
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